I’m not sure why this bugs me so much, but when a friend calls me momma, it irks me. I have this one friend, named Jamie surprisingly, that has called me momma since I have had kids. I had to tell her to call me Jamie.
Yes I am a mother, yes I have children, yes I am a momma or a mommy (I am NOT a mom…my kids aren’t allowed to call me that) or even a mom-mo as Ally calls me. But my name is Jamie to everyone else.
I’m sure some mothers will scoff at what I am about to say but I don’t define myself as a mother. I am one, but if someone said- tell me about yourself, the first words out of my mouth wouldn’t be “I’m a mother”. I think I would talk more about myself before I start talking about family.
When I think of myself, what comes to mind (other than hot as shit 
) is my sense of humor. If someone asked me to describe myself, I would say that I have a good sense of humor, try to look on the bright side of things, considerate and a hard worker. If someone asked me about my family, yes- I would mention them, but they aren’t the first things that come to mind.
I love being a parent, but I actually can imagine my life without kids. I wouldn’t want that life, but I can imagine what life is like without children or before children (it involves sleep, shitting alone, and less stretch marks).
There are some women who immediately define themselves as a mom and that just isn’t me. I blog about my kids, I Facebook about them, I talk about them, but I am able to have a conversation where I don’t mention them.
Does that make me weird? (does it even make sense) And you had all better not start calling me mommy or momma (or even worse- Mom)
I don’t think it makes you weird at all. I feel the same way. I am more than just what I created out of my body. I am more than just the partner to the person I chose to marry. I was Lisa first, and I’m still Lisa. Sometimes, though, it seems like the world doesn’t want to allow that. Once you become a wife and a mother, its somehow supposed to be the end of you as an individual. That’s not true!
I say we go burn our bras in protest!
I don’t know, with the size of my brat that could cause a disaster of epic proportions.
Love this! Agree fully!
You should be able to define yourself however you like.
Then I am 5’10, rich and have a body like Heidi klum! One can dream, right?
Hey, you already got 2 out of 3, which ain’t bad! Just gotta work on that “rich” one now….
5’4, body like tina fey, and welll$$$
Hey, my wife is 5′zip on a GOOD day. I knew her hair colour, and balding patches, LONG before I knew the colour of her eyes. If I can have a conversation with you WITHOUT staring down at the top of your head, you’re as good as 5’10″!
For some reason, I’ll never “use the restroom alone” without smiling and thinking of this post…………………….. Thanks for that Jamie!
Scary and endearing, all at the same time.
It annoys me when a friend calls me mommy (or any version thereof) I have a friend who calls me “meemaw” which I think mean “grandma” in some language. It irritates me to NO end because 1. we are the same age and 2. I am NOT a grandma.
I defined myself first as a mother then as a person for a majority of my life. Then my kids grew up and moved out. I had a pretty severe idenity crisis for a year or so. I think it’s healthier to define yourself as a person first, then someone else’s possession.
Meemaw? That’s worse than Grammy! I would never call someone grandma, unless they went to bed at 5pm after filling up on the early bird special.
I wouldn’t think to call a friend “mom” or any variation thereof – I was lucky enough to have two great ones, my own mother and a wonderful mother-in-law I had for FAR too short a time. And you’re as much a mom as I was a programmer – it’s one facet of your life. (A BIG one, granted.)
Personally, I’ll just stick to “hey, gorgeous”. Sound good?
Deal!!!
Just started reading your blog. I think any adult who calls another adult (not his or her mother) mommy is a touch off. But why can’t the kids call you mom?